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Captain Hook the Biker Gorilla
It was a sunny day in Cloudsdale, pegasi were flying, playing and working.... but today wasn't just any morning! Nope! It was the flying exam for enterance into the most prestigious flying school in Equestria, and Scootaloo was signed up and ready to go. However, Scootaloo, upon getting towards the end of the exam hit the obstacle and got a penalty. She waited on a cloud where ponies were selected, sadly, she wasn't one of the 10 that were chosen out of the 30 who showed up inlcuding herself. A pegasus stallion flew over to them pulling a van, and they were told to get in. The ride wasn't too bad, the driver stopped at the bank, then went to McSoy's, the hardware store where the young pegasi took turns riding on the quarter ride outside the store, then pretty much all over town The last stop was the weather factory. The ponies were brought inside and a mare with a white base coat, yellow mane, and was wearing a Willy Wonka style outfit, she said, "Hello, everypony, and well come to the Rainbow Factory, be sure to stay in your group." There were other ponies, they were wearing wrestling masks for some reason. Anyways, they were lead into a room, where a pony had their mask on backwards, they muffledly said, "Hello everypony and welcome to the factory floor!" Scootaloo heard that the voice was familiar and thought something was up. The pony took off their mask because they couldn't breathe, it was Rainbow Dash. Scootaloo asked, "Rainbow Dash, why are you here?" Rainbow Dash said, "I work here!" a pegasus with a yellow coat, blue and green mane, as well as a sprainned wing amongst the failing pegasi who were brought there said, "Why are we here?" Rainbow Dash switched on a radio and started singing, "You will be turned into Rainbows, everyone will be so happy, you'll be gone, but that's okay though, hey cheer up, it's not that crappy. If you assume it's your life goal to convert into a rainbow, you dare not be disappointed," Rainbow Dash flew up to the entrance into the machine in the center of the room, "once I stuff you into this hole." All the pegasi looked confusedly at each other and Rainbow Dash started up a slide show as she sang, "This is where we take your taxes, where we make the weather wanted. We're not chemists, so don't ask us how this method got so vaunted. This job does not need a degree, that is how they got stuck with me, I need this for health care, you see, so I can afford therapy!" The mare that lead them in, now not in the costume, said, "Man, that's a good reason, but that doesn't tell them anything. What about the history?" Rainbow Dash said, "The history is that I can't go back to 11.25 an hour because I eat too much fast food and it's hard to pay my bills." Surprise, the white and yellow pony glared at Rainbow Dash as she said this. "Okay, I'll admit that they usually say to do it for the love of the job and not the money, but the economy is rough right now and this is the best I could get." Rainbow Dash said ashamedly Surprise angrily said, "You know what, forget you." then said happily, "I'm going to explain it losino style," she put on a hat and, grabbed a guitar, sat on a stool and said said, "Listen up kids." Surprise started to play the guitar and sing, "Let's go back to a thousand years ago, everything you know, is owned by Celestia. The tiny blade of grass that fed on the sun. The tiny grasshopper that fed on the grass.The snake in the grass that fed on the grasshopper. And the holy evil government owned by Celestia. All things trod beneath an iron hoof. United, provided, divided by Celestia. All hailed humbly to the mighty god. Until one day, Then. Came.The War! Nightmare Moon swept from the skies, lazers from her eyes and teeth like knives. The power of our god was simply not enough to over come her sister! The one had sacrificed a piece of her mind to the dark gods for deeds unkind! Hope seemed lost until the time that Celestia. Developed. a plan! Pitch one power to retain the rest. Sacrifice in turn, was the gist. With so many what was one? This foul war must be done. It must be something she could do without. A superfluous power she could leave out. She purveyed them all and made her decision. She rested her choice, her prismatic precision. No more rainbows, was her decree! Equestria's ponies would pay this fee! But petty politics sought another route! The electorate could not do without! So the duty fell to the pegasi and when they found the solution they began to cry. Oh no! We can't procure pigment without grinding our youth into a fine mist of color, and that is the truth! But our pleas for reprieve fell upon deaf ears! And the exit polls showed our greatest fears! We must make rainbows there wasn't a choice! The boneheads and mud ponies smothered our voice! And so. We built. A machiiiiiiiiine!" Surprise lowered her guitar. The pegasus with the sprainned wing, otherwise known as Aurora Dawn screamed, "OH MAH GOD! THEY ARE GONNA TURN US INTO RAINBOWS!" Rainbow Dash didn't want to turn the pegasi into rainbows, so she showed them how the machine worked by putting in a box of crayons, the rainbow juice came out the other end. Surprise said, "Rainbow.. put in another box of crayons." Rainbow Dash did, and more rainbows were made. All the young pegasi were happy, they would live. In the end, all the young pegasi got to go home, and rainbows were now made of ground up crayons THE END :) Category:My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Category:Spinoffs/Fanfiction Category:Parody of a scary character Category:Funny Category:Happy Category:Humor Category:Bittersweet